Monthly Archives: March 2008

The Colour Espresso Makes Me Suicidal…Who Knew?

Apparently choosing a colour requires some sort of emotional intelligence that I do not possess.  There.  I have admitted it to myself.  All those years of thinking I was a normal, stable person!  It’s so depressing -I may need two things of Haagen Daaz.

So the whole painting situation begins with me going with the worst shopping companion EVER to pick paint.  I thought I knew what I wanted – a light and cool colour scheme, but then changed my mind deciding to go for warmer colours.   For those of you who have been paint shopping you can attest to the fact that there are thousands of paint colours to choose from.  Seriously for a simple colour like red you can find at least 20 different shades.  So with Jazz huffing and puffing behind me I tried to decide what colours I wanted.  45 mintues later it was obvious I had developped some kind of colour dyslexia and which point Jazz turned into her alter ego Sasha ( who scares the living daylights out of me), and I had to choose a colour fast or risk losing a limb.  So I decided on a Parisian Taupe with White for the trim.  Light colours because the room was small, but still warm.

Home.  Heart palpitations begin because I am not sure anymore about the colour.

24 hours later most of the room is done.  I have done a fabulous job but the colour is not turning out.  The paint is still wet so I am not going to scream yet about how it looks like freaking BEIGE and not no Parisan Taupe!

Paint dries and it is a latte colour.  Which is fancy for beige.  I decide I need a bold colour for an accent wall because the thought that I am a person who would choose however subconsciously to paint their living room beige is enough to make me want to take up drinking.  Jazz and I go back to the store and look at colours.  Again the dyslexia, Sasha’s rage, my indecisiveness combine to make me go with an Iced Espresso. 

Home.  Iced Espresso applied to walls looks like well…brown on a wall.  I mean the colour’s nice, it matched the damn latte very well but oh my good lord – there was something about that wall that made me incredibly angry.  And then after a whole day of looking at it I got suicidal.  I moved my couch to the middle of the room facing away from the wall and I tried to tell myself that it was nice, that I did a beautiful paint job, that I wasn’t a moron, that it matched, that I wasn’t the most horrible decorator in the entire universe.  It didn’t work.  The brown seemed to be laughing at me…it’s the kind of colour that takes over your mind.  Everytime I got up and saw it I hated it more and more.  It got to be quite irrational really.  I mean who talks to a colour?  Then Del saved me by coming over and dragging me out for Thai food and promising me we could go couch shopping tomorrow.  She also assured me that she still loves me even though I suck at decision making.

So now  I need to decide what to do.  Do I prime over the brown and paint it the same as the rest of the room?  Do I choose another colour and hope I don’t hate it too?  I am going back and forth trying to decide.  I’ve decided to keep with the latte/beige/parisian taupe because there is no way I am painting the entire room again.  My whole body was killing me afterwards and I had blisters on my hands from all the work.  So that colour definitely stays.  It’s that bloody accent wall that’s driving me nuts.  All I know is it’s either me or that brown.  I am not going home until I have a can of paint in my hands.  I’ve always like orange…or red.  Or maybe I should just redo the whole room in a new scheme. 

Symptomatic of my life…indecisive, can’t commit, and deep down underneath all the bs someone who likes beige.  I deserve to eat vanilla ice cream for the rest of my life.



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Spring Cleaning

I spent the day cleaning out closets, going through old bags of clothes and wondering how it is possible I accumulated as much as I do.  I also am tossing out some furniture – out are the chairs in the living room and some random bits of wood that I seem to have collected.

I have grand plans for my living room – a little bit of paint, a new sofa and we’ll be ready for spring.  If it ever get here.  The snow has been ridiculous this winter.  I almost drowned on my way to work  over the weekend.  And then because they didn’t plow the sidewalk had to walk in the road and I almost got run over by a massive snow plow.  Very stressful.  Although the snow is beautiful and when it snows it’s not cold at all – it brings back memories of pretending I was ‘Lost in the Barrens’ with my brothers.  We used to love playing in snow storms when we were little.

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It’s almost asparagus season and I can’t friggin wait. I am so tired of eating mostly potatoes, kale and squash.  This eating locally thing can be a bit boring.  I cheated a few times I think with celery ( I cannot make soup without celery!) but I refuse to buy stuff from bloody Chile or Brazil in the dead of winter.  My eco footprint is already big enough thank you very much.  So April is when things start to get good around here.  The hydro tomatoes start in April too.  If you haven’t already realized I have a seasonal chart on my fridge.

AP came out with this article about drug particles being found in the water.   Are people just clueing into this now?  This is old news.  The question is what are we going to do about it?  Not much if will be done if you consider what the issues are.  Money and the pharmaceutical companies.  It costs lots of money to screen, test and properly filter our water supplies (and even then we can’t get everything) and just as importantly we need to stop overmedicating ourselves.  I wonder if people are ever going to realize once and for all that every step we take has repercussions.  We also need to take responsibility for ourselves, that doesn’t include popping a pill for every little thing.  I know as well as anyone how hard it is to quit smoking but it makes me so angry when I see people who are taking about 20 pills to deal with their crappy cholesterol, their crappy heart, their crappy lungs and their crappy blood pressure and they’re still puffing merrily away.  They could at least pretend to be ashamed of themselves. 

I found a website that will allow you to check if the products you are using contain harmful ingredients.  I checked out the list last night and the only one I really have to change is my toothpaste.  I already use pretty good shampoos and conditioners and I’ve switched to different body washes too.  Apparently my favourite lotions are not on the danger list – thank God for small miracles.  The all natural stuff is ridiculously expensive too.  I saw one for 65.00 the other day…I’d rather use the actual avocado than pay 65.00 for a pot of lotion. I actually found a really nice shampoo that is made in my area and uses only natural products.  It’s expensive but not unreasonably so.  I also want to switch to more naturally based household cleaners.  With my allergies as well as the toxic cancer causing agents abounding in most cleaners I think it’s about time.   My allergies have been pretty bad for the last two days.  Whenever I do a big cleaning I suffer for it.  I have a mask but it only helps so much.  This is why I need a maid.  Not because I am lazy or anything.



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Ahhhh Shit

Today the cops finally tracked me down and served me with a subpoena.  I’ve ben avoiding them for a month.  Then today they sent a uniform to the house and I forgot I had put some zit blaster on my face in a strategic pattern to combat the uglies and good thing it wasn’t a cute cop or my life would really suck.  So much for being a good citizen – I know have to go to court to point out the little shit that caused all this mess.  And this time he will not be drunk and i’m sure will remember my face and one day I shall run into him downtown and he’ll mug me just for the hell of it.



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